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Do you remember when you were a child your mother telling you that she would put soap in your mouth it you ever told a lie? Have you ever been called out by a friend or a colleague for saying something that was not true and they knew you did not believe? Have you ever been in a situation where you have had to drink the proverbial “kool-aid” in order to save face?

I think every person that reads this can admit to one of the above statements. I think there is a lot to be said for not only being confident in what you say, but knowing that what you are saying carries weight.

I put put much thought to this and want to share what I have found. Many of us give ourselves the permission to say what we don’t believe. Whether this is simply being scared or a complexity that someone has built up over time. We give ourselves permission to act in this manner. I have found that many of our actions of dis-belief occurs from a lack of confidence in ourselves and those we interact with on a daily basis. Lastly, the things we read or watch give us the impression it’s okay to say things we don’t believe.

So what is the answer? From a conventional approach you should do things to build up your confidence, hang out with people that believe what you believe and stop reading and watching the things that tell you otherwise. Is it that simple? Is is actually possible to use conventional wisdom or are there too many complexities in life. I would say there is a balance.

I was one of those that struggled with this for many years. Through lots of research, pondering and studying I believe I have found what works for me. It’s not important for me to tell you what I do, but the importance lies with you and what do you feel you need to do so you can, with confidence, say the things you actually believe.

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